What Happens When Sibling Rivalry is Ignored Until They are Older?

The ongoing conflict between siblings, called sibling rivalry, often makes the parents irritated. This constant condition unconsciously leads parents to feel guilty and stressed, and some may develop anxiety disorders. For some parents, they may let the situation go on since this situation is so complicated to handle.

Is it good if parents let this situation go on? Given that sibling rivalry has many negative consequences for both siblings and their parents, allowing the conflict to continue may not be the best option either. So, what will happen when you let sibling rivalry go on? To know the facts about it, you can dive into our post below.

Adult Sibling Rivalry

What Happens When Sibling Rivalry Is Ignored Until They Are Older?

If you have more than one child and frequently see sibling rivalry between your children at home, you may have taken one of two opposing approaches to overcome it: warn them and teach them to be more calm, or let the conflict continue after exhausting yourself.

Letting the conflict between your children fester, however, is not the best way at all. According to psychologists, if you let the conflict continue and do not try to overcome it, some negative effects may happen to both when they’re growing up. What are these?

When turning into adults, unhandled sibling rivalry can cause a tenuous or even bad relationship between them. More than that, they may have problems when dealing with other people. Well, the impact of bad relationships between siblings will also have negative impacts on their attitudes, or they will even feel like they have no siblings later.

In addition to having bad relationship between siblings, sibling rivalry can also cause the following negative effects:

  • Suffer stress and even anxiety disorders due to his brother’s abusive behaviour.
  • Parents will feel angry, irritated and confused.
  • Bury their disappointed and angry feelings until they turn into adults. If it happens, unwanted things may happen between siblings when they’re adults.
  • Have self-esteem and emotional disorder until they’re growing up.
  • Etc.

Read also: 6 Positive Impacts of Sibling Rivalry

Of course, this contradicts the goal of having siblings, which allows people to overcome conflicts together, reduce selfishness, love one another, share in times of trouble, and many other benefits.

That’s why allowing ongoing conflict between siblings from childhood to adulthood is not allowed because there are so many positive lessons missed that will affect their personalities and self-function in their daily lives.

Is There a Positive Impact of Sibling Rivalry?

Of course, yes! There are some positive impacts from sibling rivalry if the parents handle it well. However, sibling rivalry is an unavoidable situation for siblings at home, but that does not mean it will harm the relationship between them.

According to some psychologists, sibling rivalry actually has some positive impacts for both siblings. What are these? Here are the positive impacts of sibling rivalry:

  • Allow them to have the capability of resolving any conflicts, either between them or with other people.
  • Recognize their power and use it for good.
  • Become more assertive (firm).
  • Able to recognize the differences that arise in their environment.
  • Etc.

To get it all, the role of parents is very important—the way you overcome this situation will determine the results later. There are some methods you can take as parents to overcome sibling rivalry that often happens to your children, here they are:

  • When conflict happens, stay calm, quiet, and in control.
  • Create a cooperative environment between them at home.
  • Always praise and celebrate your children’s achievements individually.
  • Play enjoyable family activities such as family dinners, board games, time at the park, and so on.
  • Always treat your children fairly, not equally.
  • Try to focus on each child’s role in the situation.
  • Listen to your children and pay attention to your children’s emotions.
  • Make sure to give them problem-solving tools.
  • If one of them makes a mistake, punish them privately.
  • Have a family meeting regularly.
  • Etc.

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