Parental divorce is something sensitive for children. When parents decide to divorce, they must be able to explain it well to their children. It is because divorce can be a traumatic incident for children. So here, the explanation about 6 ways to explain parental divorce to children.
Several Tips to Explain Parental Divorce to Children
1. Choose The Right Time
When parents divorce and then they want to explain it to their children, they have to make sure that they do it at the right time. Not only the right time for children, but also the right time for parents. They have to make sure that mom and dad are ready to explain it to their children so that they can explain it calmly. To know when children are ready to listen to this, parents can choose the time when their children’s emotions are in a good condition.
2. Explain It Together
Mom and dad have to explain about their divorce together. It is because if it is only explained by one of the parents, there may be different versions of the story and it can make children confused. Paul Coleman, a psychologist who wrote How to Say it to Your Kids, said that explaining divorce together will keep children’s trust in their parents. Another important thing that parents need to explain to them is that they are not the reason why mom and dad divorce.
Read also: Co-Parenting for Divorced Couples
3. Make an Easy Explanation to be Understood Well
When explaining divorce to children, parents have to do it with an easy explanation so that it can be understood well by children. It is because for children, divorce is not easy to understand. After divorce, there will be differences that will be felt and experienced by them so explaining it well is important.
4. Keep Giving Love
After hearing that their parents divorce, children may be afraid of losing their parents’ love. So, the thing that parents need to do is to convince their children that they will still get their parents’ love and they still can meet their parents anytime they want.
5. Avoid Insulting Each Other
There are a lot of couples who divorce and after that they hate their ex each other. And then, they vilify their ex to their children. Never do this. Even though mom is angry with dad, never insult dad in front of children because it can affect children’s feelings, thoughts, and behaviour. Parents also have to avoid fighting, arguing, and accusing each other in front of their children.
6. Understand Children’s Feelings
Not only for mom and dad, divorce is also not easy for children. Children may be sad and even they can have more negative feelings because of their parents’ divorce. So, parents need to understand their children’s feelings. If parents see their children show emotional behaviour, ask them whether they are sad, disappointed, or angry. By asking them, it can help them to express their feelings and reduce their emotional tension.